How did we get here?

How is it that I have fallen so much in love with a little boy who is just a picture on our wall as you come in our front door. How is that he already has a bed next to his brothers with fresh sheets on it and a new comforter and pillows. How is it that when I go into Old Navy I start weeping over boy cloths size 3T with airplanes on them. I have done more reading about a country I never even had an interest in visiting. I am now on the hunt for purses that can once again accommodate tippy cups and I seem to be very aware of Asian children when going to the mall. How did I get here.
How is it that when we go to church my kids know where to find the Kleenex in my Bible that I have papercliped there for quick access and can get it to me in 2 seconds flat and then ask if I need out of the pew when we sing songs like "Great is thy faithfulness". How is that when we are out doing something as a family like going to the river for hot dogs and s'mores that one of the kids always say "we'll have to do this again when Gavin gets home" or we talk about when we're all in China. How is it that now with the older kids being back in school and the house is so quite leaving me to my thoughts all I want to here is little boy sound affects for a truck or a motorcycle.


I know how we got here. God changed me. And then the rest of the family.
Our church is just now wrapping up a year of Jubilee. It was an experiment for our church to put on hold the way we have always done things, all the program stuff and think out side the box in worship. In doing this for church I also prayed that God would change the way we do things at home in being Christ centered. Then when the Holy Spirit came calling I didn't feel we could say "No"! I was also very blessed that within weeks of praying about it himself Gary was on board. That is how we were suddenly mulling over adoption papers and looking at going half way around the world for a little boy we never imaged would be so much of our lives before he even entered it.
I know people think we are crazy, we ourselves are some of those people. We have gotten both the good and the bad in reactions from people. Thankfully more good then bad.
The things I have learned about the King I serve have been far more in the last year of being pregnant through adoption then in eight years of women's Bible study. I truly give God ALL the glory on this one, it was His idea after all and we are facing another six months of waiting (the next four to five of those we will have no word on what's going on). I pray God will continue to work on me with patience and perseverance. He is an Amazing God and even though some days I wonder He will see this adoption to the end.
---Marla